I Had to Write This
Neil Strauss is the worst. I’m not name-calling, bickering, or launching some underhanded smear campaign. Strauss is the worst because he’s the lowest form of human—he’s a betrayer of trust. In Dante’s Inferno, traitors occupy the lowest ring of hell. And such would seem an appropriate place for someone who has betrayed so many well-intentioned men.
Now let me address the fan-boys, whiners, and critics right off the bat. This essay isn’t about smashing on “negs” or calling out his homoerotic fashion sense. While that stuff is entertaining as unintentional comedy, this essay is serious. Because it addresses a serious issue: it’s a critique of someone who has fucked you over.
Moreover, for all you self-proclaimed business experts who are going to say this “doesn’t help my business” or accuse me of “secretly trying to marketing myself,” please take your opinion and shove it up your ass. All I have to say to you is:
1.) Everything I write should be considered “marketing” since I sell information products. It’s not a big secret: every time you read an anything from me—whether I’m writing about how to improve your appearance or slamming on Neil Strauss—it’s marketing. (For further clarification, please listen to Tool’s “Hooker with a Penis”)
2.) According to my ethics, it would be wrong of me NOT to write this essay. Just as my personal philosophy of meeting women dictates it would be rude of me not to approach attractive women, I categorically apply that same “action-based” approach to every aspect of my life. It’d be rude if I didn’t publically smash Neil Strauss,
At first, Neil Strauss simply annoyed me. I spent a fruitless year trying things I read in “The Game” only to look and feel like an idiot. Aside from a few flaky phone numbers and getting a couple girls giggling, my tangible success with women really didn’t increase much.
Regardless of whether he feels bad about it or not, his bullshit is finally catching up to him.
I didn’t understand women better.
I didn’t feel more confident.
I didn’t appreciate women more or understand how to relate to them.
I didn’t even feel good about myself.
The only thing I really learned was how to make myself sound cool to other men on the Internet. (Which, I later realized, is the pinnacle of Neil Strauss’ “game.” But I digress…)
Because, like I said, the time I wasted and the embarrassment I endured only annoyed me. Plenty of people have given me bad advice in the past, and I’m not writing public essays about how I hate them.
With Strauss though, my hatred began to simmer as I became more involved in instructing. It’s easy to forget the human emotion that drives guys to seek out dating advice when you just give the industry a cursory glance. If you’re only looking at this industry from the vantage point of a web browser, it’s easy to overlook the pain, despair, and loneliness boiling beneath it.
But every guy who studies this stuff has his story. All of those stories begin with pain.
The more involved I got with instructing, the more stories I heard. Like so many things in life, once I heard those stories, I couldn’t unhear them. I couldn’t just look at the dating advice community from the detached vantage point of my Internet browser.
The stories stuck with me. The stories resonated with me. And, ultimately, the stories motivated me. Regardless whether you think I’m an asshole, believe what I teach is “wrong,” or just enjoy hating me, what you can’t say is that I don’t put my blood, sweat, and tears into my products. I slave over every minute detail of everything I sell.
Some People Actually Give A Damn
I say that, however, without an ounce of pride. I don’t invest so much of myself because I’m some incredible workaholic or a noble perfectionist. I’m not. But I do have a conscious. And, since I can’t unhear the stories I’ve heard, I wouldn’t be able to live with myself if I felt I wasn’t delivering my absolute best every time I accept money for my advice.
To me, that money represents time. It represents the time it took to earn it, and the time it will take to consume and apply the product. In essence, the people who buy my products trust me with a chunk of their life.
Bash on capitalism all you want, but the bond forged between a buyer and seller is a sacred bond of trust. In my case, the buyer puts his trust in me to deliver a product that’s effective, well produced, and fairly priced.
The buyer invests his time so that he can alleviate his pain, despair, and loneliness. I truly believe that every guy who makes that investment deserves success, deserves happiness, and certainly doesn’t deserve to be scammed.
A Fraud and Scammer
But Neil Strauss doesn’t see it that way. And I can prove he doesn’t with two words:
For those who don’t know what I’m taking about, the Annihilation Method is the elephant in the room that no one ever mentions. Essentially, it was a $4,000 DVD home study course of poorly produced and rehashed talking-head videos and some abysmal infield footage (not of Neil, of course…but of him “critiquing” his students).
The product was notoriously awful—yet commanded the highest price point of any DVD product in this niche. It was an abomination. And it was indisputable proof that Neil Strauss betrayed your trust. He knows your story, yet he decided to shovel you shit anyway while taking a significant chunk of your life ($4,000!).
Perhaps that product has grated on Neil’s conscious. Maybe that’s why he never mentions it, nor does he still sell it. Regardless of whether he feels bad about it or not, his bullshit is finally catching up to him. He betrayed men across the world with nonsense and an “infallible guru” persona, and now the consequences of those lies are coming back to haunt him. People who aren’t his ass-sniffing sycophants are openly calling him out for the fraud and the traitor that he is.
And we’re just getting warmed up.
Oh, and it’s not just Neil. Every shitty instructor who wants to make a quick buck is on notice. Things are falling apart. People are starting to see through the bullshit.
There are plenty more guys like me. Plenty more normal guys who don’t give a fuck about being seen as a “guru.”
We’re too normal. And that normalness prevents us from standing around silent while traitors like Strauss profit off your pain. It prevents us from putting out shitty products for $4,000.
Our normalness is why we understand you. Our normalness is why we hear your stories and can’t unhear them. We can’t unhear your stories because the pain that inspired them is the same pain we felt when we started studying dating advice.
And to sell you anything less than our best would wear too much on our conscious.
It’d be betrayal.
It’d make us a traitor—like Neil Strauss.