I could almost see his spirit laid across the floor, shattered, crunching underneath the bustle of a Lower East Side wine bar. I stood off in the corner, not unlike a trainer during a 12-round boxing match. I was ready to yell some motivational tidbits in his ear, or do what little I could to dress his wounds, but not much more. At least a dozen times that night I spat my personal mantra at him: It’s not about them; it’s about you...Continue Reading
I remember exactly where I stood when I heard it. I was in 7th grade. I was walking through the hallway of the science wing and passing by a group of older kids, cooler kids. These were the “popular” kids. As I approached the huddled mass, I caught a snip-it of a question: “…going to get porn?” Then, he said it. A freshman named Dan Beck, already a notorious seducer at the ripe of fifteen, sneered. The crowd went silent as he prepared to speak the words that would forever color my Continue Reading
A question I’m constantly asked is whether I feel it was necessary that I went through all the “bullshit” dating advice before I arrived at my simplified philosophy. And my answer is always, “I really don’t know.” Who can really say whether or not the bad advice helped me in some bizarre, roundabout way? Regardless, as I was drifting off to sleep last night, I was thinking of all the things I once did that were just a complete waste of time. For me, I only got into dating advice for one Continue Reading
Sometimes I feel like a fortuneteller. I can often tell a guy’s future. I can tell how a guy’s is going to progress, what sort of girl he’s going to end up with, and how happy he’ll most likely be. But I don’t know this by some mystical magic ball or an enchanted set of tarot cards. No, my augurs come from something much less exciting… I can tell by the questions he asks me. As someone who gets bombarded with questions every day...Continue Reading
Before I delve into dating, let me digress for a moment. I want to confess something… I suck at sports. I’m uncoordinated. I don’t have much leg speed. And my body seems unable to accept the “proper form” of any sort of sports movement—from the wrist flick of a jump shot to the elbow snap of a golf swing. I suck. For most of my life, I had to endure my suckiness at sports...Continue Reading
So the last few weeks I've been hard at work on developing my own iPhone app. I designed it as a mini-course on getting over "approach anxiety." Having an app to help coach you through those crucial moments when you see an attractive girl seemed like the perfect use for an app (since you can just pull it out of your pocket and use it as an approach coach.) Anyway, Apple just approved it and it's available in the app store! You can check it out by typing in the keyword: ApproacHER or you Continue Reading
When you imagine improving your love life, what comes to mind? Do you envision wild nightclubs? Crazy party girls with fake boobs shoved in your face? Acting like a wild rock star? Living the idealized frat house life that you missed out on in your college years? Those were the images that used to come to my mind. For a while, I thought that improving my success with women was an irreverent adventure fit for an American Pie movie. That “vision” led me down an interesting rabbit hole. Continue Reading
t’s no secret I’m a loud critic of “The Pickup Community.” While some claim my criticism is a thinly disguised marketing ploy or an outgrowth of my own insecurities, the truth is much deeper than it probably seems. For me, I spent way too much time believing the hype and myths of The Pickup Community. Those beliefs kept me from meeting and dating countless awesome women. In fairness, however, some of the material in The Pickup Community was extremely helpful and allowed me to meet and Continue Reading
You’re your own biggest cock-block. I know because I’m my own biggest cock-block. While it’s fun and easy to blame outside factors for our dating failures—her nagging friends, your genetics, or the city we live in—the thing holding you back most from having the love life you want is what’s going on between your ears. Now I’m not going to go all “self-help” on you and lambast you with a condescending rant on “limiting beliefs” or “success barriers.” The truth is more concrete than some Continue Reading
Every human should find themselves in a passionate relationship with a partner they absolutely hate at least once in their life. To nod in acceptance to that statement is to know the true face of attraction. As a long-time lover of womankind, I’ve seen some shit. I’ve seen crazy shit, wack shit, wild shit, awesome shit, and stinky shit. But through all the shit I’ve seen, one piece of shit stands out as particularly shitty: the shit idea that people make decisions logically. Don’t be Continue Reading