Making a statement is a bold move. That’s because statements are often non sequitur, having little—or nothing—to do with the flow of the conversation. In fact, statements often redirect the energy and focus of a conversation. This can either be very good or very bad.
Thus, it’s important to use statements appropriately and attractively.
When you’re attracting women, statements serve a very specific purpose. First, always remember that statements have less to do with content (what you say) and more to do with when you say it (timing). Don’t worry about having a witty or creative statement up your sleeve. Instead, focus your attention on recognizing the right moment throw out a statement.
I’m going to explain exactly how to recognize the “right moment,” but first I want to reiterate that having the “perfect line” doesn’t matter that much—definitely not as much as you probably think.
Modes of Communication
What does matter when you’re talking to women is your mode of communication. Here are a few “modes” of communication:
Inquisitive Mode: When you ask a question
Responsive Mode: When you answer a question
Relative Mode: When you follow the train-of-conversation
Supportive Mode: When you compliment or support the other person
Combative Mode: When you oppose or challenge the other person
Interruptive Mode: When you re-direct the conversation (usually with a statement)
Often statements are “interruptive” because a statement changes the topic of conversation. Statements can be completely out of left field, having nothing to do with what she’s saying, what you’re saying, or even what’s going on around you.
When it comes to having attractive conversations with women, statements are used for two (2) distinct purposes:
- Change her mood
- Amplify her attraction
Now, a word of warning: if statements are used too often, they can quickly become cartoonish or come off too gamey. Moreover, if used at the wrong time (e.g., when you and a woman are relating to one another) an ill-timed statement will make you appear immature and weird.
Personally, I’ve found the best time to use a statement is:
- When first meeting a woman
- When sending a woman an opening message on text or online
- Anytime the conversation is getting boring or you’re losing a woman’s attention
- When you’re looking to transition to intimacy (e.g., transitioning from flirting to vibing or vibing to getting physical)
- She’s trying to brush you off, but is still responding to you
In these instances, making a statement is the most effective way to communicate. Even if you blurt out a dumb statement, if you make these statements at the right time, it’ll probably work in your favor. Therefore, worry less about knowing “the right statement to say” and more about recognizing the right time to say it.
When you develop a feel for when to make a statement, you can throw out several statements. Even if your first few statements bomb as long as you stick in there and keep your confidence up, something will eventually hit. Once it does, she’ll forget all your prior misfires. Her mood will change, the conversation will instantly be more fun and flirt, and the woman you’re talking to will like you more.
The Winning Statement Formula
Even though content is secondary, knowing how to construct a great statement can add confidence to your delivery. Luckily, the best statements are always simple and colorful. Shakespeare would have had a hard time with this strategy because statements that sound too good are typically less effective.
So, don’t over-think it!
A great statement only has two parts:
- A setup
- The payoff
The Setup Phrase
The setup phrase can be something she’s used to hearing, like a cliché. In the context of flirting, it helps if the setup is some “romantic cliché” such as:
- “I enjoy longs walks on…”
- “You have lovely…”
You can probably imagine how those phrases would end—and so can she. With the “setup” phrase, you almost want her to assume you’re just another corny guy who’s going to say something predictable or give her a lame complement. The more cliché the setup phrase, the more impact your statement will have when you pair it with an irregular payoff.
The Payoff Phrase
To craft the perfect statement, pay your “setup” phrase with something odd but not too weird or off-the-wall. A good payoff phrase is something that makes sense, but she’s probably never heard before. For example, one of my old buddy Zack’s favorite lines was, “You have lovely cheekbones.” I saw Zack saw that simple statement—you have lovely cheekbones—to dozens of women and it always sparked a great vibe with women. Why? Because it’s funny, flirty, a bit weird, and—most of all—it left women wondering: what exactly does it mean? Is it a joke? A serious complement? Should she be offended? Flattered?
See why statements are so effective when conversing with women?
A well-timed statement is like an emotional jab. It catches her off guard and sparks a flirty vibe. Statements can save a dying interaction and upgrade a boring conversation.
And the best part is: you don’t have to worry about saying the wrong statement. Even if your first statement doesn’t “hit,” just try another one. The truth is this: you have no idea what statements will change a woman’s mood. That’s why using statements can be a lot of fun. It gives you the chance to blabber a string of statements until one finally hits.
In my own experience, I’ve found it’s sometimes the one you least expect that gets a woman to light up. Not only is this fun for you, but it also tells you a lot about the woman you’re interacting with. Her response gives you plenty of information about her sense of humor, her style, her personality, etc.
In closing, as long as you remember to use statements at the right time, you have an attraction “hack” to ensure you always keep your conversations with women fun, flirt, and attractive.