Women often know within the first 10 seconds of meeting a guy whether they are going to sleep with him or not…

So here are the 7 things most guys do to screw it up — and how to make sure you avoid all of them.

Mistake #7: Trying Too Hard

Have you ever seen a guy who was so obviously trying to act cool or look important, but he just ended up being the guy all the women laughed about later and made fun of? Sure you have. Like me, I’m sure you’ve had attractive female friends that always seem to hookup with the guy who “doesn’t seem to care”… but for some reason they never consider you, even though you put in way more effort.

What’s up with that? Actually, it’s very simple…

Women aren’t attracted to the guy who’s “putting in the most effort.” They want the guys they perceive to be “attractive” — which is just a convenient way to say “guys they think are cooler than they are.” And nothing says to a woman “you’re way cooler than me” than a guy who exerts a lot of effort in an interaction — especially with a woman they just met!

I realize this isn’t always obvious. It may be hard to chill out and stop trying so hard… but get used to it. Until you relax and keep yourself from blatantly trying to get her attention and/or validation, you’ll never even get off the ground with an attractive woman.

Mistake #6: Chatting But Not Attracting

What do most guys do when they are talking with a woman they find attractive? Right! They turn into Dr. Phil and play daytime talk show host as they “interview her” and try to pick topics she likes…

Well, here’s a newsflash for you: You will NEVER SPARK ATTRACTION WITH A WOMAN BY JUST AIMLESSLY CHATTING WITH HER! Women are stimulated by emotions and tension (a.k.a. flirting). Just think of the adventurous types of men women tend to like: bad boys, rock stars, and celebrities.

For most guys, women don’t immediately drool over us based on our looks or status. So how in the world do we expect to stoke her attraction by just having a boring chat? Yet we all do it: when we have a woman’s attention, we try to play it safe, ask the questions we think she’ll like, talk about stuff that’s neutral or common, and/or do our best to keep her talking to us. That’s a terrible approach! And an approach that will never fan the flames of her attraction…

Mistake #5: Apologizing For Liking Her

Another huge and avoidable mistake that most guys make when approaching a woman is apologizing for feeling attracted to her. Or, even worse, apologizing for wanting to talk to her. Attractive women intimidate most guys, getting men to bend over backward to appease them. Most men blithely jump through their hoops, do whatever it takes to keep them happy, and go out of their way to make sure she feels “comfortable” and “not offended.”

And guess what?

Attractive women wait until guy-after-guy admits SHAMEFULLY that he’s attracted to her. Sometimes the guy doesn’t come outright and say it, instead he’ll pretend he’s interested in something she likes and use that as a pretext for a date: “Let’s go see Twilight together. And I’ll pay!” Even if the guy actually has the balls to tell her directly, often he first apologizes for wanting to talk to her: “I’m sorry to bother you but…”

This signals to the woman that you’re just like all the other guys who are so intimidated by her that you feel you the need to “hide” or “apologize for” the fact you like her. All because you think that makes her feel “more comfortable” around you.

Don’t do it. Be confident in your feelings. You don’t need to come right out and proclaim exactly what you’re feeling, but definitely don’t try to cover it up. Or apologize for it.

Mistake #4: Taking Yourself Too Seriously

One of the most common mistakes the average guy makes is getting overly emotional before a woman even knows him. This happens because he takes the interaction (and himself) way too seriously. Essentially, he’s invested all of his male ego and pride into one interaction, with one girl (who he doesn’t even know yet!).

As men, it can be hard to get over our pride when approaching a woman for the first time. But it’s something you have to do. It’s something you MUST do to be attractive to women!

We all know women love men with a sense of humor, yet how can we be “funny” or even “interesting” if we are trying to micromanage every aspect of an interaction? Take a deep breath and relax. Remind yourself to lighten up. Don’t forget to laugh, even if it’s at yourself—especially if it’s at yourself!

If you can remember to do that, you’ll see for yourself how that attitude attracts women like a magnet.

Mistake #3: Making It Obvious You Rehearsed Your Approach

Earlier I mentioned that it’s a mistake to try so hard that you make it apparent you see the woman as “cooler” than you; well, another way men signal to a woman they feel “less cool” than her is by rehearsing their approach.

Nothing will spoil an interaction with a woman faster than when a guy worries about every detail of an approach—from his opening line to how to ask for her number. If you find yourself fretting about such minutia, STOP! It’s not helping!

Women are never attracted to men who aren’t in control of a situation. You need to display leadership qualities (a.k.a., confidence.) After all, everyone knows women aren’t attracted to insecure wimps!

Women are never attracted to men who aren’t in control of a situation.

So, stop worrying that you need to rehearse every detail of an approach before you approach a woman. Instead, just do it—and feel confident that you can handle whatever happens. Surprise yourself with how well it goes when you let go of trying to control the situation.

Mistake #2: Not Understanding How To Tactfully Move Things Forward

Now I’m going to blow you away with a little insider dating secret: women expect you to move an interaction forward… and actually will get turned off if/when you fail to do so. You hear that right, if you don’t guide the interaction toward intimacy (i.e., get physical with her), she will actually LOSE her attraction (and respect) for you.

(I know, I know, hard to believe, right?)

If you’ve been talking to a woman for more than a couple of minutes, she’s probably already thinking, “Okay, when is going to ask for my number?” or even, “Okay, so when is he going to kiss me?” If you don’t do it — or fail to do it smoothly — her next train of thought will be how to politely dismiss you. (Which often comes in the form of a pity pat on the shoulder and her saying, “I think we’re better off just being friends…”)

This isn’t just advice for a woman you just met; this applies to EVERY stage of courtship. You, as a man, have to lead. YOU need to ESCALATE. It’s YOUR job to confidently approach a woman; it’s UP TO YOU to ask for her number; YOU’RE THE ONE who has to ask her out; IT HAS TO BE YOU to go for the kiss—along with everything after that.

If you hesitate, if you don’t know what to do—or how to do it—then you’ll end up losing her. Every. Damn. Time. every time. And you know it.

Mistake #1: Not Seeking Out Direction or Help

Here we are, the number one, biggest dating mistake of them all: NOT SEEKING OUT HELP. Nothing will ensure a guy remains single and/or never date the type of women he really wants more than repeating the same dating mistakes over and over again.

Make no mistake: this is the ONE mistake that holds men back the MOST from EVER having success with women and dating. The type of success that would (finally!) leave them truly satisfied.

I understand, though, why this can be a tough pill to swallow. We are, after all, guys. We’re known to be stubbornly proud and proudly stubborn. We never want to look HELPLESS, we don’t want to admit we feel LOST. So, we refuse to ask for directions and deny we need help learning how to attract women.

I know better than anyone.

I was there myself, just a few short years ago. I was stubborn. I was proud. And I’d just moved to New York City. That meant I was walking past beautiful women all day yet I didn’t have a clue how I might approach them, let alone get a date with them. My frustration grew more by the day. Every time another girl passed me by I felt the sting of failure.

It was a vicious cycle: I did nothing as these women passed me by because I didn’t know what to do; yet, I didn’t know what to do because I never tried…

Then there came a weekend when I met up with a friend from college at a bar in midtown. Immediately we noticed two attractive women. Without saying a word, we both knew. Knew what we should do…yet since neither of us had the balls to approach them, we did nothing. As I close my eyes now, I can still see the movie of that night playing in my head. A tragedy.

When I got home that night I couldn’t sleep. Every time I closed my eyes, the movie, the tragedy, looped in my mind’s eye. It had finally become too much. That was when I made the decision: I’d do whatever it took to learn how to successfully meet, attract, and date beautiful women.

After lots of “field work” and trying all kinds of crazy tips and techniques, I didn’t just reach my goal–I mastered it. As a result, I no longer feel paralyzed by insecurity. I no longer fear that I might never meet a girl I’m really attracted to… I no longer dread ending up a sob story, a guy who remains single forever.

I’ve written a book on the topic, and I’ve coached guys all across the United States and taught thousands of men all across the world. If you’re serious about getting this area of your life handled and you want to discover what really works, make the decision I made. Make the decision to master this part of your life!

If you want to start right now, click on the link below and watch a YouTube video Bobby Rio and I created on 3 ways you can get a woman to chase you: